The Jedi Path Guide for Force Apprentices

Children under the age of 14 are advised against reading The Jedi Path unless they are skilled in using sword-like objects and understand not to put foreign items in their mouths. The additional items that come with the Jedi manual include a letter detailing its history, a Padawan braid, a Jedi Credit medallion, a Jedi starfighter patch, a burnt poster of the Jedi Code, a map of the Jedi Temple, a lightsaber diagram drawn on a napkin from Dex's Diner, and a note about missing pages torn out by a Sith. The Ancient Masters who contributed to The Jedi Path...

The Jedi Path is not recommended for chilluns under the age of 14, unless they are particularly adept at wielding sword-like implements and know better than to put foreign objects in their mouths. In addition to its formidable vault, the Jedi manual's removable additions encompass: A letter tracing the book's history a severed Padawan braid A metal Jedi Credit medallion A Jedi starfighter patch A burned poster of the Jedi Code A map of the Jedi Temple A lightsaber diagram sketched on the back of a napkin from Dex�s Diner A note on the missing pages torn from the book by a Sith. Ancient Masters who authored The Jedi Path include: Fae Coven, Grand Master and head of the Jedi Council; Crix Sunburris, Jedi Ace starfighter pilot; Restelly Quist, Jedi Chief Librarian; Skarch Vaunk, Jedi Battlemaster and lightsaber expert; Bowspritz, Jedi Biologist and expert on the Living Force; Sabla-Mandibu, Jedi Seer and Holocron expert; Morrit Ch�gally, Jedi Recruiter; and Gal-Stod Slagistrough, Jedi leader of the Agricultural Corps. Personal commentary has been added by: Yoda; Thame Cerulian; Count Dooku; Qui-Gon Jinn; Obi-Wan Kenobi; Anakin Skywalker; Ahsoka Tano; Darth Sidious; and Luke Skywalker. Press a button and the doors draw apart. The motion unleashes a symphony of Jedi sound effects through surging blue LED backlighting. Then, slowly, an inner platform rises to reveal - booyakasha! - an exclusive, faux-leather-bound edition of The Jedi Path. That sweet vaulted exterior you see? It opens mechanically, and to much Star Wars fanfare. No, not seriously. In fact, I think the "single surviving copy" of this manual can actually be had by anyone with cash money or a major credit card. You, me, my brother Darryl, my other brother Darryl.... As this chick at the gym I have a massive crush on until she starts talking would say: O...M...G.! Holy truffled Millennium Falcon , me? According to high-ranking officers of the Galactic Republic, through wars and rebellion, only a single copy of The Jedi Path: A Manual for Students of the Force has survived. They add, "It is now passed on to you."

Some more items you'd probably like to throw your cash on...

Woodmans Pal 20 Handcrafted Land Clea...

The Woodman's Pal 2.0 features an ash wood handle and leather sheath that are handmade and finished by Amish craftsmen in Lancaster County, PA. The high-carbon steel blades are hand sharpened and subjected to temperatures of up to 1500 degr...

$149.95

 0    155

BrewDog Geeks Craft Beer Guide

BrewDog's Craft Beer for the Geeks is a detailed exploration of the science and various styles of craft beer. The Scottish brewery's second book is designed to inform, educate, and inspire readers with specific and enjoyable tips for savori...

$15.98

 0    159

truBrain Cognitive Enhancement Shots

truBrain Think Drinks are not like your usual energy drinks filled with caffeine and corn syrup. Instead, they are designed to improve cognitive function for better focus, attention, mental sharpness, and productivity. Available in Original...

$89.00

 0    156

Star Wars Kama Sutra Galactic Parody ...

SN Herder created The Star Wars Kama Sutra as a parody book for fans of the franchise who enjoy a unique sense of humor. This book showcases a collection of photographs featuring Star Wars action figures in ancient Hindu sex positions, as w...

$19.50

 0    149

Scoop Stack Ice Cream Cylinder

Cuisipro claims that their Scoop & Stacker is capable of effortlessly slicing through extremely hard ice cream thanks to its innovative push-lift-push mechanism. I can't see any logical explanation for why Cuisipro decided to create an ice ...

$14.95

 0    155

Slobproof Paint Syringe Pens for Easy...

Slobproof Touch-Up Paint Pens are a unique solution for easily fixing scratches, patches, stains, and repairs on walls, ceilings, doors, and furniture. These pens work by drawing paint from the can in a syringe-like manner and applying it e...

$9.99

 0    158

Body by Starfleet Fitness Adventure M...

Star Trek: Body by Starfleet: A Fitness Guide, written by Robb Pearlman, is a fully illustrated manual that links the connection between fitness and stasis. It includes over 30 exercises and stretches inspired by 5 decades of Star Trek, pre...

$14.19

 0    172

Sunnytech Desktop Stirling Engine Kit

The Sunnytech desktop Stirling Engine sits on a wooden base without paint, which was selected for its cost-effectiveness. Users are encouraged by Sunnytech to personalize the base by painting or staining it to suit their preferences. The en...

$59.99

 0    164

Baseball Bat Beam Blaster

The LED flashlight operates on 3 size C batteries and can run for up to 4-1/2 hours, with an effective range of 450 feet. Made with a weatherproof aluminum casing, it is not recommended for use in underwater battles with Krakens. While it m...

$21.66

 0    163

Henry Cavendish Himalaya Mug Shaving ...

Henry Cavendish Himalaya Shaving Soap is a round soap that is convenient for use with a mug. It is elegantly packaged and has a refined British name. Its main appeal lies in its affordability and suitability as a simple yet thoughtful gift ...

$14.74

 0    162

Norse Tradesmans Rune Casting Kit

The Viking Rune Divination Set consists of 24 authentic ox-bone rune pieces and a leather pouch that can be unfolded into a leather mat for casting runes. When using the Elder Futhark set, you will throw 1, 2, or 3 pieces onto the mat and l...

$55.86

 0    166

The Engineers Utility Wallet Card

The Pocket Engineer wallet card is constructed from laser-cut enamel-coated stainless steel that is 0.8 mm thick. It serves as a handy reference tool for both men and women in STEM fields, fitting easily into a wallet alongside other cards ...

$12.99

 0    163

Juicy Salif Citrus Sculptural Squeezer

Philippe Starck designed the Juicy Salif for Alessi, an Italian design firm. This 3-legged piece stands at 11-1/2" high x 5-1/2" in diameter and 4-1/2" high x 1-3/4" in diameter, made of aluminum-cast and mirror-polished. It can be used as ...

$74.99

 0    147

PowerDot 20 Electric Muscle Stimulati...

Therabody's PowerDot 2.0 line provides a convenient and portable option for athletes and fitness enthusiasts looking to alleviate soreness, fatigue, and pain. Ideal for those with active lifestyles, these electric muscle stimulator pods can...

$159.00

 0    156

Fizzics Beer System Elevate Your Brews

The Fizzics Beer System is inclusive of all types of beer, regardless of price or style, as it can enhance lagers, Hefs, stouts, and more using its patent-pending fluid and gas technology. It does not require separate CO2 or Nitro canisters...

$299.88

 0    156