The Jedi Path Guide for Force Apprentices

Children under the age of 14 are advised against reading The Jedi Path unless they are skilled in using sword-like objects and understand not to put foreign items in their mouths. The additional items that come with the Jedi manual include a letter detailing its history, a Padawan braid, a Jedi Credit medallion, a Jedi starfighter patch, a burnt poster of the Jedi Code, a map of the Jedi Temple, a lightsaber diagram drawn on a napkin from Dex's Diner, and a note about missing pages torn out by a Sith. The Ancient Masters who contributed to The Jedi Path...

The Jedi Path is not recommended for chilluns under the age of 14, unless they are particularly adept at wielding sword-like implements and know better than to put foreign objects in their mouths. In addition to its formidable vault, the Jedi manual's removable additions encompass: A letter tracing the book's history a severed Padawan braid A metal Jedi Credit medallion A Jedi starfighter patch A burned poster of the Jedi Code A map of the Jedi Temple A lightsaber diagram sketched on the back of a napkin from Dex�s Diner A note on the missing pages torn from the book by a Sith. Ancient Masters who authored The Jedi Path include: Fae Coven, Grand Master and head of the Jedi Council; Crix Sunburris, Jedi Ace starfighter pilot; Restelly Quist, Jedi Chief Librarian; Skarch Vaunk, Jedi Battlemaster and lightsaber expert; Bowspritz, Jedi Biologist and expert on the Living Force; Sabla-Mandibu, Jedi Seer and Holocron expert; Morrit Ch�gally, Jedi Recruiter; and Gal-Stod Slagistrough, Jedi leader of the Agricultural Corps. Personal commentary has been added by: Yoda; Thame Cerulian; Count Dooku; Qui-Gon Jinn; Obi-Wan Kenobi; Anakin Skywalker; Ahsoka Tano; Darth Sidious; and Luke Skywalker. Press a button and the doors draw apart. The motion unleashes a symphony of Jedi sound effects through surging blue LED backlighting. Then, slowly, an inner platform rises to reveal - booyakasha! - an exclusive, faux-leather-bound edition of The Jedi Path. That sweet vaulted exterior you see? It opens mechanically, and to much Star Wars fanfare. No, not seriously. In fact, I think the "single surviving copy" of this manual can actually be had by anyone with cash money or a major credit card. You, me, my brother Darryl, my other brother Darryl.... As this chick at the gym I have a massive crush on until she starts talking would say: O...M...G.! Holy truffled Millennium Falcon , me? According to high-ranking officers of the Galactic Republic, through wars and rebellion, only a single copy of The Jedi Path: A Manual for Students of the Force has survived. They add, "It is now passed on to you."

Some more items you'd probably like to throw your cash on...

Penguin Fingers Cooling Gel Sleeves

Penguin Fingers Finger & Toe Ice Packs are versatile sleeves that can be easily slipped on to provide cooling and compression relief for individuals who do not have access to traditional ice packs. These one-size-fits-all gel packs do not n...

$9.50

 0    80

Toilet Paper Origami Elegant Paper Fo...

This unique book is titled Toilet Paper Origami: Delight your Guests with Fancy Folds & Simple Surface Embellishments. In the book, author Linda Wright teaches techniques for creating charming shapes out of toilet paper, such as bunnies and...

$17.49

 0    82

Kinkajou DIY Bottle Cutting Candle Kit

The Kinkajou includes all necessary components and instructions for cutting and finishing bottles with diameters ranging from 43 to 102 mm. In addition to the bottle cutter set, you will also receive a pound of soy wax balls, 5 wooden wicks...

$19.99

 0    78

Phoenix Outdoor Defense Mala Necklace

The Buddha Beads offered by Phoenix Outdoor are not only a fashionable accessory but also an effective tool for self-defense. This necklace consists of 108 beads, each measuring 0.4" in diameter. The total weight of the necklace is slightly...

$29.69

 0    82

Fizzics Beer System Elevate Your Brews

The Fizzics Beer System is inclusive of all types of beer, regardless of price or style, as it can enhance lagers, Hefs, stouts, and more using its patent-pending fluid and gas technology. It does not require separate CO2 or Nitro canisters...

$299.88

 0    76

Soundfreaqs Portable Sound Master

Soundfreaq's Pocket Kicks feature custom drivers and a passive radiator placed between two full-metal, open-air grills. This setup is designed to enhance airflow and deliver full-frequency sound, with lower frequencies emitted from the rear...

$23.99

 0    80

Hamilton Beach TwoWay Brew Station

The Hamilton Beach Two-Way Brewer offers several useful features for simplifying the coffee brewing process. It is equipped with a front control panel that allows users to choose between Regular or Bold brew strength, adjust the hour and mi...

$69.99

 0    76

Scorch Torch TriFlame Refillable Lighter

The Scorch Torch Triple Jet Flame is a refillable lighter designed for cigarettes and cigars, featuring a built-in punch tool. With adjustable tri-flame control and an auto-open safety cap, this sleek lighter has a piezo electric ignition. ...

$9.99

 0    77

Overbed Mobile Workstation in Various...

The Overbed Table is a mobile workstation that can be adjusted to accommodate mattresses ranging from twin to California king sizes. Its desk surface is constructed of wood attached to a steel frame and is available in various colors. Ideal...

$84.99

 0    83

StuffaBurger Stuffer Press

The Stuff-a-Burger press is a straightforward device consisting of two pieces, enabling grillmasters to stuff all the various toppings found on Grease Truck burgers inside the meat. While it may not be able to perfectly recreate the iconic ...

$25.99

 0    79

Nordic Ware Kettle Smoker Set

The Kettle Smoker includes a set of fine wood chips at the bottom to add a smoky flavor to meats, seafood, and pizza crusts. It has a high dome cover for larger items like whole chickens and roasts. The set also comes with a base, water dri...

$91.27

 0    77

CULER SOLO Portable Cooling Fan

The CULER SOLO, a flash-evaporative personal air cooler, is ideal for any 4th of July picnic. It falls somewhere in between a fan and a traditional air conditioner, utilizing Flow Burring technology to transform water into small, consistent...

$164.93

 0    87

The Vagina Artistry Coloring Book

The Big Coloring Book of Vaginas is one of the top picks for Dude Novelty Gifts on DudeIWantThat.com, which is supported by its readers.

$350.00

 0    76

The Star Wars Cookbook Galactic Break...

The Star Wars Cookbook: BB-Ate is a collection of 29 breakfast and brunch recipes created by author Lara Starr and photographer Matthew Carden. Featuring dishes named after beloved Star Wars characters like Hans Soloatmeal and Luke Skywaffl...

$18.99

 0    75

Cards Against Humanity Bizarre Expansion

- The Absurd Box, a 300-card expansion pack for Cards Against Humanity, was launched during their highly anticipated Black Friday sale event, where everything was 99% off. - Described as "pretty weird," the cards in the Absurd Box were crea...

$20.00

 0    77