blk Jet Black Spring Water

Black bottled water is an American product, specifically from New Jersey. It's not shocking, as water from New Jersey tends to be black. The business is owned by brothers Albie and Christopher Manzo.

blk. black bottled water is actually an American product. More specifically, a Jersey product (no surprise there--isn't all of the water in Jersey some shade of black?) It's the business venture of brothers Albie and Christopher Manzo. Whose mother, Caroline, is part of the New Jersey flavor of the wacked out, fame whoring casts of the Real Housewives franchise. And probably also the mob. blk. water contains no dyes, no artificial flavors, no sugar, and no calories. And, good news, Jewish peoples, it's kosher too. If you've read this far, you are about to be rewarded. Remember that earlier dig about Canadians? Sand in the ground near blk.'s Canadian springs serves as a natural filter, leaving the water taint-free, yet enriched with essential minerals, namely those of the fluvic persuasion. Fluvic minerals are found in prehistoric plant matter buried deep within the earth. They are naturally black and, when added to translucent water, dominate the visible spectrum, and give blk. its name and hook. blk. contains over 77 fluvic and humic minerals, which are chock full of hydrating electrolytes. In addition, the light weight of blk.'s proprietary mineral blend allows the human body to absorb it quickly, and achieve hydration faster than with tap and other pedestrian waters. For those less cynical than we are, or for those just curious why blk. is black, here's the cleanse-your-spirit spiel. It's basically coffee, without the coffee flavor, aroma, caffeine...without the reasons people drink coffee. It's the Crystal Pepsi marketing ploy in reverse. Slick packaging, visual twist on a cultural mainstay, and a lot of yada yada about making you harder, better, faster, stronger if you drink it. Regardless of what it purports to be, what blk. is, is a big black bottle of black, black water. That, from what we gather, tastes like a big clear bottle of crystal clear water. Ahhh, Canadians. Despite the fact no one has ever heard of them, blk. takes itself very seriously, claiming to be richly endowed with fluvic minerals and other alchemic phenomena that will turbocharge your life force. We wondered too, but the answer is no. blk. black bottled water is not part of an SNL skit � la black caulk or Colon Blow. It's

Some more items you'd probably like to throw your cash on...

Samsung Space Monitor Sleek Organized...

- Pre-orders for the Samsung Space Monitor are now being accepted, with automatic shipping set for February 23, 2019. - The power and HDMI Y-cables of the screens on the arm stands are routed through recessed channels for hidden and tangle-...

$399.99

 0    36

Abducktion An Offbeat Duck Snatching ...

Abducktion: A Quirky Duck Abduction Game was conceived during a brainstorming session fueled by THC, psilocybin, or Coors Light. The idea of abducting ducks for a party game was born, with the added twist of UFO interns taking the ducks for...

$34.99

 0    36

AleHorn Artisan Drinking Vessels

- Every AleHorn has a distinct shape and appearance. The walls and handles of the vessel are crafted from a single horn piece, which is then completely sealed and coated with a food-safe finish. Tankards and horns can hold both cold and roo...

$32.99

 0    36

UnHide Shleepy Cozy Faux Fur Wrap

The versatile Shleepy Everywear Blanket by UnHide is perfect for various activities such as staying cozy on a plane, walking the dog in cold weather, or lounging on the couch. This wearable blanket, which can be worn as a blanket, cardigan,...

$79.00

 0    34

Cap Gun Party Set Bottle Opener Shooter

Cap Gun bottle openers and cap shooters are sold in packs of 6, with each pack containing sets of 3 in different colors for team fun. They are affordable enough for you to purchase one for yourself and all your friends Cornelius before your...

$5.99

 0    32

Miracle Melting Witch Wicked Transfor...

The Miracle Melting Witch, a creation of Two's Company, is one of many slime-putty products in a collection that includes different characters and accessories for shaping and assembling. This specific Miracle Melter is based on the Wicked W...

$14.99

 0    34

Nerf Titan CS50 Rapid Fire Blaster

The upcoming Elite Titan CS-50 toy blaster by Nerf is equipped with a motorized system and a 50-dart drum, perfect for unleashing a flurry of foam during play. It includes all 50 Nerf Elite darts that it shoots rapidly before requiring a re...

$99.99

 0    36

Military Precision Compass Kit

- The package comes with a carrying pouch, lanyard, and belt clip. Tritium micro-lights are placed along the compass face for easy navigation in low-light conditions. The device provides accurate readings in temperatures as low as -50 degre...

$95.99

 0    37

Arkam Beard Styling Ionic Brush

The Arkam Ionic Beard Straightener Brush is designed to assist you in managing your beard, even if you already own beard ornaments, beard balm, a beard comb, a beard shaper, and beard clippers. This beard straightener utilizes ionic technol...

$20.99

 0    33

The Snacking Dead Cookbook Ghoulish P...

The cookbook The Snacking Dead: A Parody includes 50 recipes, such as Sweetish Fleshballs, Crawldaddy Etouffe Toasts, and Gratuitous Violence Jello Mold. Some recipes highlight the parody theme, while others focus on the dish itself. A phot...

$9.40

 0    36

Alien Sleep System Unsettling Outdoor...

The Alien Sleeping Bag is fully prepared for any situation, from cold weather to intense sunlight, from minimalist camping to evading facial recognition software. It can also come in handy when dealing with unexpected situations like a canc...

$117.79

 0    36

Vabroom Hybrid Sweeper with USB Recharge

The Vabroom is a hybrid sweeper and vacuum that runs on a USB-rechargeable battery and boasts a 20,000 RPM motor. This motor gives the Vabroom strong suction power while sweeping. It also includes a 1-cup reservoir for collecting dust and d...

$79.89

 0    32

The Hungover Cookbook Remedial Recipe...

Milton Crawford, the author of The Hungover Cookbook, organizes the book into six sections, each targeting a different type of hangover described in PG Wodehouse's novel The Mating Season. The cookbook offers forty recipes strategically pla...

$6.31

 0    30

ThermARest LiteFlex Cot Featherweight...

Weighing just 2 pounds, the Therm-A-Rest UltraLite Cot is touted as the lightest cot available. Additionally, it can be packed down to a remarkably compact size for easy transport. The cot is designed with a BowFrame that enhances user comf...

$159.95

 0    36

CucinaPro Brick Building Waffle Maker

With the Building Brick Waffle Maker from CucinaPro, you can create 14 brick-shaped waffles in one batch. This electric appliance comes with nonstick cooking surfaces and two 10 x 13 construction plates for building and stacking your breakf...

$49.54

 0    32