How to Avoid Unhelpful Behaviors

Some actions that are not considered helpful include: Leaving a server a written tip instead of a monetary one, as the former will last longer. Not flushing the toilet in a public restroom to save water. Mowing your lawn early in the morning.

Some examples of How Not to Be Helpful include: Leaving a server a note with a helpful tip written on it instead of a monetary tip, because the latter will disappear once s/he's spent it (probably on booze and cigarettes) but the former will last forever. Not flushing the toilet after dropping a deuce in a public restroom, presumably to conserve water. Mowing your lawn at 6 a.m. on a Saturday "so your neighbors can wake up to the smell of freshly cut grass." Not giving up your seat on public transit for an elderly person "so they have the chance to strengthen their leg muscles." But since the thoughtless are also usually self-absorbed and not very self-aware, it could just be fun reading about ourselves. With the exception of my mama and, like, Keanu Reeves, most of us have already got it down pat. I don't think many people really need JJ Harlan's How Not to Be Helpful: An Illustrated Guide for Thoughtless Adults.

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